I like so many other anxiety sufferers have developed coping
mechanisms. What do we do though when these become part of the problem?
Coping mechanisms for anxiety tend to be created by the
sufferer themselves. They aren’t cures and they will have varying levels of
success. Some can be greatly helpful such as getting enough sleep however some
are unhealthy coping mechanisms and can make the problem worse. I have several
for my different types of anxiety. I never consciously decided to create coping
mechanisms they just happened.
My anxiety affects many areas of my life, both large and
small. The level at which I suffer varies greatly and episodes seem to be
triggered mainly by stress and tiredness. The sources of my anxiety are wide
and have varied throughout my life and therefore so have the mechanisms used.
(I thought some relaxing pictures from my weekend by the sea would be good for this post.)
For example, I have always had a huge fear of spiders and at
times this has spiralled into an irrational form of anxious behaviour. This was
particularly bad during my early twenties. I could not use a toilet anywhere
without doing a thorough spider search first. I also couldn’t go to sleep
without doing the same. My searches helped me ‘cope’. Whenever I thought of a
spider, which was frequent, I would ‘cope’ by touching wood with the piece of
skin between my thumb and forefinger (what’s that called?!) It had to be wood
and had to be that part of my hand that touched it or I was convinced a spider
would appear.
This behaviour stopped me panicking and as such was a coping
mechanism. But was it really helping or was it just adding to the problem?
Granted it did it me no harm to touch wood and search for spiders but it wasn’t
tackling the issue. If anything, the behaviour had spiralled me further into
despair and I couldn’t escape my rituals.
Thankfully I have largely overcome this particular area of
my anxiety. I eventually recognised the problem and I was brave enough on
occasion to go without my rituals and spiders did not appear. The more I did
that the easier it became to not do them and the less severe my anxiety became.
I still hate spiders, you would never get me to Australia, I
still search public toilets and if I am having a bad day I will still touch
wood in that way. I’m so much better than I was though and I am relieved for
that.
Of course, I still suffer with anxiety, that was just one
area I have tackled. New sources of anxiety seem to appear all the time and
thus so do the unhealthy coping mechanisms.
We all have them, whether its avoiding certain situations,
sticking to a routine, always having water nearby or whatever. They appear to
help but really, they are part of the problem.
The difficulty is identifying them and then finding the
courage to stop them.
I have used a somewhat trivial example which may not best
get my point across but I wanted to use an example that I had a positive ending
for.
I will talk much more about my anxiety in future posts and
hope for now this has given you something to think about. It’s very true that
realising something is a problem is the first step to solving it.
What are your anxiety coping mechanisms? Can you see some of
them are part of your problem?
Kelly x
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Hi Kelly, I have arachnophobia too and still suffer from it to this day but not half as bad as it was in my teens. I honestly didn't think I'd ever be able to live alone because I couldn't handle being alone in a house with a spider!
ReplyDeleteBut as you say, coping mechanisms don't treat the root cause and unless you face the issue head on, it's never gonna go away. I went to psychotherapy and it worked in reducing my levels of panic, enabled me to leave my parents house! The thing is, you have to actually face a spider in order for it to work. I did do that with very small ones but never went as far as a big house spider, so never fully overcame it.
It's the same with anxiety. If you don't work on the underlying issue, it won't go away. I personally have never used coping mechanisms for anxiety. I just went straight to eradicating it. That's what works and that's why I don't have anxiety any more :)